Too Much SPANDEX!!

So today we got a call up Provo Canyon at Bridal Veil Falls report of an assault. The RP is taking his dog for a walk and the suspect is a biker (no not the motorcycle kind either). As I am taking the detail and asking all the routine questions about what the suspect is wearing, which way is he heading, etc. Well as I was getting the clothing description all my co-workers are listening to me repeat what he is telling me. He told me that the suspect was wearing an orange tank and black spandex shorts and his friend was wearing a blue spandex shirt and black spandex shorts. Well one of my co-workers thought I had said an orange cape and black spandex on, so she thought that some guy had jumped out of the bushes and just started beating on a guy. They were trying to get me to ask if he had a turban on.

Today has just been one of those days for calls. Is it a Full Moon????

HE'S WEARING WHAT???

DISPATCHER: 911 What is the address of your emergency?

CALLER: Okay, I am not drunk, I am not high, I am not crazy?

(By this time I was thinking GREEEAAAAT!!)

DISPATCHER: Okay, what is the address?

CALLER: It is up the Canyon...

DISPATCHER: Where up the Canyon?

CALLER: About a mile above the Campground on the main road

DISPATCHER: What is the problem?

CALLER: Well.......there is a male and a female in the road.

DISPATCHER: Okay, what are they doing.

CALLER: Well the male is riding the female across the road and I am afraid that they are going
to get hit.

DISPATCHER: He is doing what?

CALLER: The female is down on all fours and the male is riding her like a horse across the road.

DISPATCHER: Okay......So what are they wearing?

CALLER: Well the female is dressed in all black and

DISPATCHER: Okay and what is the male dressed in?

CALLER: Weeellll......he has a colorful turban and a whip.

DISPATCHER: He is wearing what?????

CALLER: He has a colorful turban and a whip in his hand.

DISPATCHER: Okay sir we will get a deputy up there as soon as we can.

This happened end of September beginning of October of last year. I still get razzed about it to this day.